My, my, how the time flies. After this, I only have one more of these to write. Thank you to everyone who read them all this time, and anyone who read any part of this great story I've lived and tried to chronicle throughout it all.
This week I went on an exchange with an Elder from Korea. In South Korea, all men are required to serve in the military for two years. So he served there first, and is on his mission now. He has been around the mission before, so I know him. He is not easy to miss because I'm pretty sure he is single-handedly the most muscular person I have ever met in person. EVER. He is quite large, and quite strong. Anyway, I found myself on an exchange with him this last week. When we woke up in the morning, he said to me, in his developing English, "This is yours," as he handed me a small plastic bottle of mysterious fluid "it will help you build muscle". Come to find out it was some kind of protein mix, and didn't taste half bad, but that is not the worst of it, nor the climax of this little story. We went on to do a pull-up routine he knew, and it was a pretty good workout. Well, after that he said, "Now is death-by-push-up". I wasn't exactly sure what that was, but I had a pretty good guess and it was not something I wanted to be a part of, but his size and enthusiasm made it clear I had no choice. So, to describe what happened next in brief: we did push-ups until I died. The next day I couldn't lift my arms. LITERALLY. The following day they were so sore and stiff, and I still couldn't lift them. Taking off my shirt or putting it on was the hardest part of my day. Today I still have stiffness and feel a little sore, but boy I won't do anything like that ever again.
So now that we've all had a laugh at Elder Callor's frail physical weakness, let's move on to the important part of this, the latest installment in my mission adventures.
I mentioned a few emails before, or the last one perhaps, about a member I knew from before who came here with her husband and is a completely different person. Well we have met with them a few times, and a lot of old things have come up. While back in one of my previous areas, she was still alone and bitter, and her Bishop asked her to give a talk on the Atonement. I spent many hours trying to help her understand the Atonement, but part of her was resisting what it really meant, because of what it would mean for her and how that would change her future. Well I left some kind of an impact and was able to help her see, and feel from the Spirit, that she was good. That she was really, truly, worth something. Coming here, a year later, she still is trying to finish that talk. Well after meeting with my companion and I at the church with her husband one night, for more than a few hours of talking and explaining, we covered a lot of ground. She was understanding things more and more, but was missing something, something key to her. She couldn't quite express it, but she was repeatedly trying to say that she had felt a dramatic change in her life several times; moments where she had bad feelings and painful memories taken away in an instant. She knew we were trying to explain that was an example of the Atonement in her life, but couldn't quite get her head around it. She couldn't see what grace was and how it was possible because of the Atonement. In a moment of silence, instantly, welling up from within me, I began to sing quietly
"I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me,
Confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me.
I tremble to know..."
"What did you just say?" she asked.
"Confused at the grace." I said.
Tears were shared, and love was felt. So many years of pain and confusion and loss poured out from her heart and her eyes. What she could relate to above all was how baffled she feels at what has been done for her. That's when it all clicked for her. She went home that night and finished her talk on the Atonement. She felt another chapter of the Lord's love close in her life, and began a new one, eager to continue in her marriage and the rest of her life with His love empowering her all the way.
We don't always know how He does it. Amazing as it is, we know why He does what He does is because of His love. When pain is lifted, burdens lightened, and sorrows comforted, we can't fully comprehend what has been done. We are all, in our own way, "confused at the grace that so fully he proffers [us]". After seeing these changes in myself, some sudden, and others over two years, and even more over a lifetime, my only possible response is to say in exultation, "Oh it is wonderful."
I pray we can all feel and see that in our lives as well.
Until next week,
Love,
Elder Callor
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